I am really glad that I agree with the Girl Scouts on this one, because I promise you guys, not a single one of my moral convictions would hold up to deprivation of those perfect, delicious bits of peanut buttery goodness that are Do-Si-Dos.
“They’re killing adorable puppies for no reason at all and I can stop it? And all I have to do is give up Do-Si-Dos? Sorry, I’m out.”
dubiousmerchant:
I found this letter from a hatemonger about Girl Scouts - I bought 6 boxes so far and I’m looking at getting my daughter into Girl Scouts.
stfuhatemongers:
The radical homosexuals have found out that their perverted scheme for the Girl Scouts of America will not go unopposed.
In fact, the lid has been blown off their whole operation.
You see, over the past few months Public Advocate has been leading the effort to prevent the inclusion of boys into the Girl Scouts ranks.
It all started in Colorado when young Bobby Montoya’s mother demanded that he be allowed to participate in his local Girl Scouts, including going on camping trips and sharing sleeping spaces with the girls.
And her only justification for his inclusion: He likes to wear skirts.
Despite the decision of the local troop leaders to turn him away for obvious reasons, the higher ups overrode them, forced his inclusion, and set a new standard for the Girl Scouts nationwide:
If any minor claims to be a girl they must be allowed to join.
There is no way of knowing how many girls could be hurt by this new policy!
Well let me tell you, the leadership thought they could get this radical change implemented nation-wide without making a peep, but this was actually the last straw.
You see, for years now the Girls Scouts of America have been secretly in bed with the worst of the worst in the radical liberal lobby.
Planned Parenthood, the Homosexual Lobby, and the United Nations. The national leadership for Girl Scouts of America works with them all.
But Public Advocate sounded the alarm and the fight has been on ever since.
Now concerned parents and young ladies in the Girl Scouts are fighting back against their leadership’s out-of-touch proclamations.
Three troops in Louisiana completely disbanded rather than allow boys to masquerade as girls in their ranks.
And now a new group, Honest Girl Scouts, is educating the whole country about the radical Homosexual Agenda that the Girl Scouts are embracing.
At the fore-front of the Honest Girl Scouts is a young girl who has created a video begging Americans to boycott Girl Scout cookies.
It touches my heart to see a young woman willing to take such a stand against the radical Homosexual Lobby.
And I am very proud to say that Public Advocate’s work has played a part in encouraging her to speak out.
My friend, we cannot let them fight this alone.
I pledge to you right now that Public Advocate will fight alongside them in this struggle.
It is completely unacceptable that any group would put this nation’s young girls in that much danger.
Will you help me see justice done?
For the Family,
Eugene Delgaudio
President, Public Advocate of the United States
Girls won’t be hurt by the decision to let anyone who thinks they’re a girl call themselves a girl. Nor are boys at risk when those who are perceived to be girls call themselves boys.
It’s all just labels, anyway. “Girl” and “boy” are allusions to “male” and “female”, and those are just biological states. These labels shouldn’t be used to persecute or suppress people. They are meant to illustrate the dichotomy that exists in the biznazz of procreation. It’s a sperm and an egg. That’s what makes folks. We’ve been extrapolating that for a very long time—the people who produce eggs are females, and the people who produce sperm are males.
At this point, the human species is advanced enough to start messing around with those designations. We haven’t had to struggle to procreate and flourish for a very long time, now, so why shouldn’t alternative sexual orientations become more accepted? We don’t need everyone to procreate—and even if someone is biologically indisposed to do so in a natural way (i.e. sexual intercourse), science is making inroads and ensuring that artificial procreation is safe and possible and hey go for it.
Basically, my (highly controversial and damnable) position on this point is that gay people are not “meant” to have children of their own, in the same way that heterosexual people are ”meant” to do so. The quotation marks are meant to encapsulate the myriad of circumstances that come about to make gay parents fit to raise children, and straight parents unfit.
All of this is to say that boys can be girls, and girls can be boys. You can’t be both, from a biological perspective, unless you’re okay with having more in common with flowers than with humans. And if biology isn’t the basic influence between gender identity, I guess I’m just setting the bar really low for humans. Maybe some of us are post-sexual. I don’t know.
Fuck Thin Mints
Always Do-Si-Dos
